In October, Jeff and I embarked on a new adventure together. It began with thirty hours of classes (plus homework, despite the promise I made to myself after graduating that I would never take another class again).
Lots of paperwork and elbow grease later, we are licensed foster parents (or, as we are called in Tennessee, resource parents). Our first foster child arrives this next week, for 48 hours of respite care.
For privacy reasons, I can't tell you anything about the child, or even how the visit went after it is over. But I can tell you about our journey: what made us decide to do it, and what we had to do to become licensed.
Monday, April 25, 2011
Saturday, April 23, 2011
House of (Poor) Health
This has been a month of sickness at Casa Rebecca. It began on April 1, when we were supposed to go to Kentucky to see my sister, should-be sister-in-law, and nephew, who were at my parents' house. Jeff was too under the weather to go along, so I took Vinny up there for a 24-hour visit, because I had to get back home to fly out early Sunday morning for a conference. We were stopped on the interstate in the middle of nowhere because there had been an accident, when Vinny started screaming about his eyes hurting. Two hours later, my bonus mom looked at his eyes and declared that he had pinkeye.
I felt like the world's best aunt: bringing my contagious child to expose my nephew to disease at the very beginning of an epic two-month cross-country trip. But I took Vinny to an urgent treatment center on Saturday morning to get him medicated, and then we devised ways that the boys could play together without spreading infection.
Treating Vinny for the pinkeye was not so fun. He was really scared of the drops and I would just hold him down and put them in, but I didn't know how Jeff was going to handle that after I was away. But luckily, Jeff had a stroke of genius and let Vinny put allergy eyedrops into Jeff's eyes. After it became a mutual eye-dropping process, there was no longer an issue.
On Sunday I traveled to San Francisco for a conference. I was staying at a beautiful hotel at the top of Nob Hill. On Monday I was abnormally tired -- beyond the usual fatigue of sleep deprivation, jet lag, etc. Monday night I woke up with severe chills -- I suffered through them all night because I had not thought to pack any medicine. In the morning, I had a choice: walk three blocks straight downhill to a pharmacy, and then try to hike the three blocks straight back up, or pay $10 for some gold-plated tylenol from the hotel. I paid the $10. They even delivered it to me. I spent most of Tuesday lying around in my room.
I found out that a friend of mine was going to be on the same flights as me on the way home, and on Wednesday morning we left San Francisco. For the connection I had requested assistance to get between the gates, so I got to ride one of those people movers for the first time, which was fun. But the landings of my flights were incredibly painful to my ears, which were apparently congested (I had no idea until I flew). I understand why babies cry when the plane is landing. I was tugging at my ear lobes in the hopes that something would help. When I got home, my ears were so clogged that the outside world sounded like it does when I wear earplugs.
The next morning, I went to the medical center at work, where they gave me some antibiotics for my ear infection, and then I stayed home for two days. I was feeling enough improved to go to work on Monday, especially because I wanted to avoid the paperwork.* But I did go to my regular doctor on Wednesday, because my ears were still incredibly painful.
I am a good and sharing wife, and I passed whatever I had over to Jeff. I had blamed him for my illness, and it may be that he did give it to me and then I gave it back to him in mutated form (with earache). So he went to the doctor this past Tuesday because he was feeling so lousy.
On Tuesday I hosted an interviewee. Normally I am polite and shake people's hands, but I did not shake his because I had noticed that my eyes were feeling grainy and painful and were getting kind of pink. The next day I went to the doctor and she confirmed that I had pinkeye. And yesterday it seemed like Jeff was coming down with it too. We have washed all the towels and sheets in hot water and are now using them only once before throwing them back in the wash again, until the infection subsides. We are also watching Vinny's eyes to make sure that he doesn't get it again. He has been dispensing the drops into my eyes for me, and takes the whole process, including hand-washing, very seriously.
We had invited my dad and bonus mom down for the weekend, but they uninvited themselves after finding out about all the germs in our household. "We'll come another time," they said. We've been sick for nearly 4 weeks in this household, but surely it's got to end!
* My workplace has a strange policy that if you are absent from work for more than 4 days in a row with the same condition, you are placed on short-term disability. Weekends count against the number of days, probably to discourage people from using sick days for vacation. This is not the first time I have dragged myself in to work in order to avoid the arduous paperwork process. All you have to do is survive a half day and the counter gets reset.
I felt like the world's best aunt: bringing my contagious child to expose my nephew to disease at the very beginning of an epic two-month cross-country trip. But I took Vinny to an urgent treatment center on Saturday morning to get him medicated, and then we devised ways that the boys could play together without spreading infection.
Treating Vinny for the pinkeye was not so fun. He was really scared of the drops and I would just hold him down and put them in, but I didn't know how Jeff was going to handle that after I was away. But luckily, Jeff had a stroke of genius and let Vinny put allergy eyedrops into Jeff's eyes. After it became a mutual eye-dropping process, there was no longer an issue.
On Sunday I traveled to San Francisco for a conference. I was staying at a beautiful hotel at the top of Nob Hill. On Monday I was abnormally tired -- beyond the usual fatigue of sleep deprivation, jet lag, etc. Monday night I woke up with severe chills -- I suffered through them all night because I had not thought to pack any medicine. In the morning, I had a choice: walk three blocks straight downhill to a pharmacy, and then try to hike the three blocks straight back up, or pay $10 for some gold-plated tylenol from the hotel. I paid the $10. They even delivered it to me. I spent most of Tuesday lying around in my room.
I found out that a friend of mine was going to be on the same flights as me on the way home, and on Wednesday morning we left San Francisco. For the connection I had requested assistance to get between the gates, so I got to ride one of those people movers for the first time, which was fun. But the landings of my flights were incredibly painful to my ears, which were apparently congested (I had no idea until I flew). I understand why babies cry when the plane is landing. I was tugging at my ear lobes in the hopes that something would help. When I got home, my ears were so clogged that the outside world sounded like it does when I wear earplugs.
The next morning, I went to the medical center at work, where they gave me some antibiotics for my ear infection, and then I stayed home for two days. I was feeling enough improved to go to work on Monday, especially because I wanted to avoid the paperwork.* But I did go to my regular doctor on Wednesday, because my ears were still incredibly painful.
I am a good and sharing wife, and I passed whatever I had over to Jeff. I had blamed him for my illness, and it may be that he did give it to me and then I gave it back to him in mutated form (with earache). So he went to the doctor this past Tuesday because he was feeling so lousy.
On Tuesday I hosted an interviewee. Normally I am polite and shake people's hands, but I did not shake his because I had noticed that my eyes were feeling grainy and painful and were getting kind of pink. The next day I went to the doctor and she confirmed that I had pinkeye. And yesterday it seemed like Jeff was coming down with it too. We have washed all the towels and sheets in hot water and are now using them only once before throwing them back in the wash again, until the infection subsides. We are also watching Vinny's eyes to make sure that he doesn't get it again. He has been dispensing the drops into my eyes for me, and takes the whole process, including hand-washing, very seriously.
We had invited my dad and bonus mom down for the weekend, but they uninvited themselves after finding out about all the germs in our household. "We'll come another time," they said. We've been sick for nearly 4 weeks in this household, but surely it's got to end!
* My workplace has a strange policy that if you are absent from work for more than 4 days in a row with the same condition, you are placed on short-term disability. Weekends count against the number of days, probably to discourage people from using sick days for vacation. This is not the first time I have dragged myself in to work in order to avoid the arduous paperwork process. All you have to do is survive a half day and the counter gets reset.
Monday, April 18, 2011
Racing for a Cause
This May will be the third time that I have run in a 5K race benefitting a local CASA group. A colleague of mine was the original organizer of this race and she is also a CASA volunteer. For those who don't know, CASA stands for Court-Appointed Special Advocates, and these volunteers are there to represent the best interests of the child as they navigate through the family court and child welfare system. I admire my colleague and her tireless efforts at bettering the lives of children.
I do what I can to support the cause. Last year, I strong-armed a lot of friends into participating in the race. This year, in conjunction with a wellness initiative at work encouraging people to walk more, I have started a walking group and invited the people in my department to participate, with the goal of training up to walk this 5K race in May. And on Wednesday, we will hold a pizza party/informational meeting about the race, in an effort to encourage more people to sign up.
I don't think I could do what my friend does, at least not at this point in my life. It's important work and I hope to contribute in my own way to bettering the lives of children in the foster care system.
I do what I can to support the cause. Last year, I strong-armed a lot of friends into participating in the race. This year, in conjunction with a wellness initiative at work encouraging people to walk more, I have started a walking group and invited the people in my department to participate, with the goal of training up to walk this 5K race in May. And on Wednesday, we will hold a pizza party/informational meeting about the race, in an effort to encourage more people to sign up.
I don't think I could do what my friend does, at least not at this point in my life. It's important work and I hope to contribute in my own way to bettering the lives of children in the foster care system.
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Jim's Pancakes
This is a cool site my should-be sister-in-law tipped me off to: Jim's Pancakes. Jim is much more talented than I could ever hope to be when it comes to making pancakes, and makes all kinds of interesting pancake sculptures for his daughters.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Happy Fair Pay Day!
What, you aren't having a big party? Actually, neither am I. Today is the day of the year that marks how many additional days it would take for the average woman to earn as much as the average man did in 2010. Not exactly something to celebrate. Female Computer Scientist has a good post about it, for your erudition!
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Intelligence vs. Kindness
When I was young, I used to admire intelligent people; as I grow older, I admire kind people. -Abraham Joshua Heschel (via)Intelligence is so over-hyped and over-rated! As a child, my intelligence was honed sharply from birth. All the music, the education, and the extracurricular activities were aimed at putting me at the top of the brightest and best. My intelligence was to be used to change the world -- to fix all its problems, to make a difference.
While kindness was not optional, it was (ironically) enforced in a very unkind manner. I was expected (based on my intelligence, I suppose) to be capable of age-inappropriate feats, such as being thoughtful at the age of four.* And kindness to others was often motivated by our duty as privileged people, not as a natural consequence of being interconnected.
I have overcome a great deal of my elitist upbringing, although there is still much to do. I attribute much of my success to my inner sense of justice, which has always been with me.** My intelligence has also played a role, allowing me to think abstractly about others' hurtful behaviors, rather than being immediately insulted; broadening my outlook on the world around me; and giving me the ability to process stimuli in several ways before settling on a conclusion.
Kindness is my connection to humanity -- it is the love I feel for those I know and those I don't; those who are kind to me and those who are not; those who are hurting and facing injustice.
Becoming a mother has dramatically increased my kindness and sensitivity towards others, especially children. Children are the most vulnerable human beings on earth, and I feel compelled to do what I can to help make their lives better.
While I know I cannot save the world (certainly not with my intelligence alone!), I can create a little ripple where I am that will propagate to those around me. And perhaps if I make that wave, they will be inspired to create a wave of their own, and before long, the whole seascape has been redefined.
* As the mother of a four-year-old, I can tell you it is IMPOSSIBLE for them to be thoughtful. It's just something their brains are lacking at this point in development. The trick is to model the behavior you want them to eventually develop.
** My mom was once called out of the church service because in my Sunday School class we were playing Musical Chairs, which I found to be an unjust game because not everyone got to have a chair! I threw a fit and they had to get her there to calm me down.
Tuesday, April 05, 2011
A Tale of Two Blisters
Almost two years ago, my mean running coach was away for a while, so I was walking at lunchtime nearly every weekday with my friend "C." She and I walked a 5K route that I had discovered. Every day as we were headed out, we would see my friend "J" from upstairs, walking back towards our building.
My brain, although primarily occupied with math, does think about other things sometimes. I had long ago realized that C and J had a lot in common, and would probably make a good couple. But, at that time they were both getting over painful breakups, and neither felt that they were ready to date. Still, I thought it would be a good idea to introduce them to each other in a non-dating, no-pressure environment.
"You know that guy I wave at every day?" I said to C. "He's one of my colleagues from upstairs. He has lost more than 50 pounds since the beginning of the year. I bet he would love to see our walking route. Would you mind if I invited him along sometime?"
Not at all, said C, always a good sport. So I talked to J, really hyping up the awesomeness that was our walking route, and he agreed to try it out for a change of pace.
Alas, the day the three of us were supposed to go walking, I had developed two enormous blisters on the soles of my feet, and was unable to walk such a long distance. My socks were not wicking the sweat away from my feet sufficiently, and the rubbing had caused these two big blisters to develop on the balls of my feet.
"I'm sorry," I said to J, "but I will be unable to walk today. But I'm sure C would be happy to show you the route!" J replied that since he didn't know her, he wasn't comfortable walking with her. Despite my assurances that she did not bite, he could not be persuaded. "Oookay," I said. "I probably won't be better until next week, but we'll do it then."
C came over to my office later that morning, and I told her about my blisters and what J had said. "Let's solve that problem!" she said, and we walked upstairs and she introduced herself to him: "Hello, my name is C, now you know me and we can go walking today."
They went walking that day, and every day for the rest of the week while my sad blisters healed. In that time, they got a chance to talk and get to know each other, and they really hit it off. After my blisters healed, I bought some expensive moisture-wicking socks and walked with them for a few days. Then I was away for almost two weeks, and at one point soon after that they went on their first date.
Their relationship continued to blossom and I learned recently that they got engaged! I have never felt such happiness about blisters as I did when they told me -- I could not have purposefully contrived such a perfect setup.
Still, I think I will keep wearing the expensive socks. I'll figure out another way to help people fall in love.
My brain, although primarily occupied with math, does think about other things sometimes. I had long ago realized that C and J had a lot in common, and would probably make a good couple. But, at that time they were both getting over painful breakups, and neither felt that they were ready to date. Still, I thought it would be a good idea to introduce them to each other in a non-dating, no-pressure environment.
"You know that guy I wave at every day?" I said to C. "He's one of my colleagues from upstairs. He has lost more than 50 pounds since the beginning of the year. I bet he would love to see our walking route. Would you mind if I invited him along sometime?"
Not at all, said C, always a good sport. So I talked to J, really hyping up the awesomeness that was our walking route, and he agreed to try it out for a change of pace.
Alas, the day the three of us were supposed to go walking, I had developed two enormous blisters on the soles of my feet, and was unable to walk such a long distance. My socks were not wicking the sweat away from my feet sufficiently, and the rubbing had caused these two big blisters to develop on the balls of my feet.
"I'm sorry," I said to J, "but I will be unable to walk today. But I'm sure C would be happy to show you the route!" J replied that since he didn't know her, he wasn't comfortable walking with her. Despite my assurances that she did not bite, he could not be persuaded. "Oookay," I said. "I probably won't be better until next week, but we'll do it then."
C came over to my office later that morning, and I told her about my blisters and what J had said. "Let's solve that problem!" she said, and we walked upstairs and she introduced herself to him: "Hello, my name is C, now you know me and we can go walking today."
They went walking that day, and every day for the rest of the week while my sad blisters healed. In that time, they got a chance to talk and get to know each other, and they really hit it off. After my blisters healed, I bought some expensive moisture-wicking socks and walked with them for a few days. Then I was away for almost two weeks, and at one point soon after that they went on their first date.
Their relationship continued to blossom and I learned recently that they got engaged! I have never felt such happiness about blisters as I did when they told me -- I could not have purposefully contrived such a perfect setup.
Still, I think I will keep wearing the expensive socks. I'll figure out another way to help people fall in love.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Enjoying the Spring Weather
Today the three of us went on a hike together. Our town has a lot of greenways, so we went on one where we got to see a lake in a former quarry and an old cemetery. I don't know how long we were out walking -- probably 2 or 3 hours -- but Vinny did quite well until the end when he got tired.
The weather was beautiful -- sunny, but not too hot. The trees don't have leaves on them yet, but they will soon.
The weather was beautiful -- sunny, but not too hot. The trees don't have leaves on them yet, but they will soon.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
My Little Mathematician
Vinny loves numbers. (I wonder where he got that from?)
He loves to count. He will just start counting and keep going as high as he can, sometimes with humorous results (e.g., ninety-eight, ninety-nine, ninety-ten, ninety-eleven...). He also loves to count people, or toys, or anything else he can figure to count. When he is upset, I can take advantage of his proclivity for numbers, and calm him down by counting to 100 together.
He loves clocks and timers. I was getting exasperated with him the other morning for wasting time when I was trying to get him ready for school, so I turned on the timer and he suddenly saw it as a challenge to beat the countdown. He is really into telling time, and remarks on the passing of nearly every minute in the car on the way to school. He's also fascinated by the thermometer in the car, and we have nearly daily conversations about the relative heat or cold of a range of temperatures.
His favorite book these days is 26 Letters and 99 Cents, (the 99 cents part, not the letters part). It has pictures of coins (or, as he calls them, "coinks") that add up to the numbers 1 through 99 (skipping quite a few at the end, thank goodness!). From this book he has learned to identify pennies, nickels, dimes, and quarters, and how the coins add up to various numbers. I swear I have read him this book a countably infinite number of times.
We play games with numbers. We count together, alternating who says the next number, so that one is counting evens and one is counting odds. We find cool number patterns and remark on how cool they are (e.g., "Mama, it's 12:34 -- one two three four!" "Cool! Good observation, buddy!"). He loves to type or lay out a string of digits, and make me say what number it is (e.g., 8537832104 is 8 billion, 537 million, 832 thousand, 104).
It is really fun to enjoy numbers together. I look forward to teaching him how to play Sudoku and Kenken when he is older (games he already wants to play but lacks the skills at this point). I hope he never loses his enthusiasm for math!
He loves to count. He will just start counting and keep going as high as he can, sometimes with humorous results (e.g., ninety-eight, ninety-nine, ninety-ten, ninety-eleven...). He also loves to count people, or toys, or anything else he can figure to count. When he is upset, I can take advantage of his proclivity for numbers, and calm him down by counting to 100 together.
He loves clocks and timers. I was getting exasperated with him the other morning for wasting time when I was trying to get him ready for school, so I turned on the timer and he suddenly saw it as a challenge to beat the countdown. He is really into telling time, and remarks on the passing of nearly every minute in the car on the way to school. He's also fascinated by the thermometer in the car, and we have nearly daily conversations about the relative heat or cold of a range of temperatures.
His favorite book these days is 26 Letters and 99 Cents, (the 99 cents part, not the letters part). It has pictures of coins (or, as he calls them, "coinks") that add up to the numbers 1 through 99 (skipping quite a few at the end, thank goodness!). From this book he has learned to identify pennies, nickels, dimes, and quarters, and how the coins add up to various numbers. I swear I have read him this book a countably infinite number of times.
We play games with numbers. We count together, alternating who says the next number, so that one is counting evens and one is counting odds. We find cool number patterns and remark on how cool they are (e.g., "Mama, it's 12:34 -- one two three four!" "Cool! Good observation, buddy!"). He loves to type or lay out a string of digits, and make me say what number it is (e.g., 8537832104 is 8 billion, 537 million, 832 thousand, 104).
It is really fun to enjoy numbers together. I look forward to teaching him how to play Sudoku and Kenken when he is older (games he already wants to play but lacks the skills at this point). I hope he never loses his enthusiasm for math!
Monday, March 14, 2011
Bunk Bed Update
As I alluded to in the previous post, Vinny's bunk bed finally came. It has been working out great so far.
It is a little big in his very small bedroom. Unfortunately the way the room is configured, the only place to put the bed is right by the door, but the door opens such that it does not interfere. The thing I like about it though, is that even with his door open (as he insists on keeping it at night), he can't see out so that makes it easier to sneak past without disturbing him.
The bed also has a trundle underneath, meaning that there could potentially be room for three children. (I have visions of two of his boy cousins* staying over for a sleepover someday.) However, we have only one mattress at the moment -- he is sleeping on the lower bunk because he is much too young to sleep on the top as of yet.
He's enjoyed it so much that when we first got the bed, we had to pretend that it was nighttime and so he could pretend to sleep in it. And he's been going to bed in his own bed without a fuss, and not even complaining when I don't sit beside his bed for five minutes.
Here's hoping I don't jinx it by saying this, but I am so glad we got the bunk bed for him, because it has made a world of difference at night!
* Either my sisters' sons, or Jeff's sister's sons. Probably not both sets of cousins at the same time, though!
It is a little big in his very small bedroom. Unfortunately the way the room is configured, the only place to put the bed is right by the door, but the door opens such that it does not interfere. The thing I like about it though, is that even with his door open (as he insists on keeping it at night), he can't see out so that makes it easier to sneak past without disturbing him.
The bed also has a trundle underneath, meaning that there could potentially be room for three children. (I have visions of two of his boy cousins* staying over for a sleepover someday.) However, we have only one mattress at the moment -- he is sleeping on the lower bunk because he is much too young to sleep on the top as of yet.
He's enjoyed it so much that when we first got the bed, we had to pretend that it was nighttime and so he could pretend to sleep in it. And he's been going to bed in his own bed without a fuss, and not even complaining when I don't sit beside his bed for five minutes.
Here's hoping I don't jinx it by saying this, but I am so glad we got the bunk bed for him, because it has made a world of difference at night!
* Either my sisters' sons, or Jeff's sister's sons. Probably not both sets of cousins at the same time, though!
Sunday, March 13, 2011
My Poor Baby Boy
My sweet baby boy has been sick since Friday. He's been running a fever for three days now. He has also been suffering from diarrhea. I got concerned this afternoon when his temperature was still above 100 F despite the fact that he was under the influence of acetaminophen. So I have called the doctor's office and hopefully the nurse will get back to me soon.
But, on the bright side, he has been sleeping very consistently in his own bed, because he finally got his cool new bunk bed* on Tuesday and has been faithfully sleeping in it because it is so cool. He hasn't even considered sleeping in the bed with us despite feeling so sick.
* Best investment EVAR!!!!
But, on the bright side, he has been sleeping very consistently in his own bed, because he finally got his cool new bunk bed* on Tuesday and has been faithfully sleeping in it because it is so cool. He hasn't even considered sleeping in the bed with us despite feeling so sick.
* Best investment EVAR!!!!
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Taxing My Patience
I'm not trying to brag, but I make a lot of money. Despite the fact that I am the only income earner in the household, we are very firmly in the top quintile of household incomes in the United States.
Commensurate with a large income is a large tax burden. A larger percentage of my earnings are taken by income taxes and payroll taxes than were taken when I was a graduate student, for example. But I don't mind -- it's part of my responsibility as a citizen. I benefitted (and still continue to benefit) from others' tax outlays, so it's only fair that I do my part.
I do not understand those who seek to avoid paying their fair share of taxes through the extension of tax cuts and special exemptions for the wealthy. Their avarice only serves to hurt the people around them, and ultimately themselves. Why should programs like Head Start (proven to dramatically improve the future prospects of children in low-income families) be on the chopping block? I am happy to fund programs like that, if for no other reason than that when I'm old, I'd much rather encounter these kids as my doctor or nurse rather than robbing my house for drug money.
It makes me sick to think that some people would prefer to have a larger number in their bank account instead of contributing to the general welfare of their country. Paying taxes is patriotic, and helping those who are less fortunate is our duty.
Commensurate with a large income is a large tax burden. A larger percentage of my earnings are taken by income taxes and payroll taxes than were taken when I was a graduate student, for example. But I don't mind -- it's part of my responsibility as a citizen. I benefitted (and still continue to benefit) from others' tax outlays, so it's only fair that I do my part.
I do not understand those who seek to avoid paying their fair share of taxes through the extension of tax cuts and special exemptions for the wealthy. Their avarice only serves to hurt the people around them, and ultimately themselves. Why should programs like Head Start (proven to dramatically improve the future prospects of children in low-income families) be on the chopping block? I am happy to fund programs like that, if for no other reason than that when I'm old, I'd much rather encounter these kids as my doctor or nurse rather than robbing my house for drug money.
It makes me sick to think that some people would prefer to have a larger number in their bank account instead of contributing to the general welfare of their country. Paying taxes is patriotic, and helping those who are less fortunate is our duty.
Saturday, March 05, 2011
Thoughts on a Rainy Saturday Afternoon
In the latest news:
- I ordered some new chairs for the dining room. The table is old but serviceable, the chairs -- not so much. Somehow they got sent to Oregon. I don't know how that happened. But the customer service representative set me up with a new shipment.
- We bought bunk beds for Vinny from a local furniture store, as a reward and incentive for sleeping in his own room. Today, the delivery guys started putting it together only to discover that it was the wrong bed. They had brought a double bed size bunk bed, not a twin size! So, they had to take it back and reschedule us for delivery on Tuesday. It was going to be a really cool bed, with bunks plus a trundle on the bottom. Luckily, the trundle was the right one so they let us keep it and he is going to be sleeping on that for a few nights. He is pretty excited about it, pretending that it was nighttime several times, so not all is lost. I think he will be excited to stay in his own bed now (definitely a step up from a mattress on the floor).
- The toilet in our hallway bathroom stopped working. The tank stopped filling. Jeff successfully replaced the apparatus inside the toilet.
- Our kitchen sink faucet broke. The stem unit inside the handle got bent up for some reason. No problem, we could just get a new one, right? Well, our faucet was relatively new, and the store doesn't carry the replacement parts for it. So I ordered it online. The total cost was $25, more than half of which was shipping.
- It is raining. A lot. I will be interested to see what the structural engineers say next week about our foundation. The evidence of water seepage will be fresh.
Thursday, March 03, 2011
Is this Thing On?
Sorry, vast blogging audience, that I just up and left you hanging there. February was a long month, even though it was only 28 days. And, I didn't hardly even do anything remotely interesting or significant. It just seemed to never stop. But, here are a few things that have happened:
- I found out that we will be getting our Nissan Leaf in May. I am so excited about it!
- I test drove a Nissan Leaf over the weekend. I'll post a longer entry about the test drive, but the main thing I was concerned about was whether it had sufficient headroom for a long-torsoed driver such as myself. The good news is, there was room to spare! So I am all set!
- The bad news is that we discovered that there is a big leak or crack in the foundation of our house. We have a finished basement, but the leak is in a room that was just a storage room we rarely went into. We did not realize the extent of the problem until we cleaned the house and emptied that room and saw all the nasty mold growing on the wall. Jeff took out the drywall and a friend who is a home inspector came over to assess the damage. It was nasty enough that we have two foundation experts coming next week to give us quotes. Our friend will be there too. It is likely that the estimates will be in the low five-figure range. I am hoping (but seriously doubting) that our homeowner's insurance might pay for some of this.
- We paid some people to come and give our house a good cleaning from top to bottom. We were just sick of it being kind of grungy and grimy. The house sparkles now (apart from the nasty part with the water damage). We are going to try to keep it clean, and maybe even hire a maid service to come in regularly as well.
- We are having bad luck with plumbing right now. The tank on the back of one of our toilets decided to stop filling. There's either a problem with the pipe that connects to the toilet or with the apparatus inside the toilet, because water just trickles into the tank. Then, the stopper in the bathtub decided to get stuck and not come out. And then, the handle for the cold water in the kitchen sink decided to not turn off fully. It has been a little frustrating, to say the least.
- I've been wiped out by some sort of nasty cold or flu bug. I actually had a fever on Tuesday, so I went home from work early and then I stayed home yesterday and today. I am feeling better now and plan to go back to work tomorrow, but I am still not fully recovered.
Well, hopefully I will have the time to write about the test drive. It was a great experience!
Tuesday, February 01, 2011
Losing 400 lbs
We have been cleaning our house lately. We finally just got really sick of all the mess, so we started cleaning it out. Jeff joked that our house had lost 400 pounds (thus the title of this post). He could be right: several loads to the recycling center later, our house is starting to look good.
We finally unpacked the last of the boxes we had moved here more than five years ago. I went through a lot of papers and shredded the documents we no longer needed. We also cleaned out closets and piled unwanted clothing into boxes, in preparation for Vinny's school's annual garage sale. In the closet next to the front door, I discovered a lot of things I had forgotten that we had, such as some felt to put on chair bottoms and some markers you can use on windows. That closet is now bare, except for a few coats, and it is also the vacuum cleaner's new home.
A few weeks ago I scrubbed the kitchen floor with a scrub brush, getting all the dirt out of the pits and pores of the vinyl, and it now looks really good. After we finish with all the clutter, we plan to hire somebody to come in and clean the place, from top to bottom. It will be so nice to have a really clean house again, and hopefully after this we will keep it that way.
We finally unpacked the last of the boxes we had moved here more than five years ago. I went through a lot of papers and shredded the documents we no longer needed. We also cleaned out closets and piled unwanted clothing into boxes, in preparation for Vinny's school's annual garage sale. In the closet next to the front door, I discovered a lot of things I had forgotten that we had, such as some felt to put on chair bottoms and some markers you can use on windows. That closet is now bare, except for a few coats, and it is also the vacuum cleaner's new home.
A few weeks ago I scrubbed the kitchen floor with a scrub brush, getting all the dirt out of the pits and pores of the vinyl, and it now looks really good. After we finish with all the clutter, we plan to hire somebody to come in and clean the place, from top to bottom. It will be so nice to have a really clean house again, and hopefully after this we will keep it that way.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Humor, Preschooler Style
Vinny's sense of humor continues to grow and change. I taught him the concept of the knock-knock joke over the summer, and he loves it still. For some reason, his favorite stage from which to tell jokes is the potty. So in the evening, when he is sitting on the potty doing his business, he is also telling me jokes.
Most of his jokes really aren't that funny, except for the fact that he laughs so heartily. For example, while on the potty, the punchline of his knock-knock jokes is often "[X] farted!" which gets pretty old pretty fast. He also repeats the old standards that I taught him, such as "Boo!" "Boo who?" "Don't cry -- it's just a joke!" and "Dwayne the bathtub, I'm dwowning!"
But it can be funny when he tells a surreal, Dada joke, such as "Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Bob!" "Bob who?" "Bob sat on a mushroom!" and its sequel, which culminates in "Bob got off the mushroom and sat on a log!"
Most of his jokes really aren't that funny, except for the fact that he laughs so heartily. For example, while on the potty, the punchline of his knock-knock jokes is often "[X] farted!" which gets pretty old pretty fast. He also repeats the old standards that I taught him, such as "Boo!" "Boo who?" "Don't cry -- it's just a joke!" and "Dwayne the bathtub, I'm dwowning!"
But it can be funny when he tells a surreal, Dada joke, such as "Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Bob!" "Bob who?" "Bob sat on a mushroom!" and its sequel, which culminates in "Bob got off the mushroom and sat on a log!"
Monday, January 17, 2011
Adventures in Stupid Speakers
Last week, a friend of mine attended a computer science talk and was faced with the ever-ubiquitous Gratuitous Pr0n* Reference (GPR). It made me want to FEMINIST HULK smash something to hear of yet another incident of GPR.
I am not a fan of P..n, to say the least. I find it highly offensive and degrading to women (and to men, as well). The reasons I believe this are long and complicated, but suffice it to say that this is based upon long hours of thinking, and studying of feminist theory, as well as my own ideas about social justice. So when I encounter some jerk bringing a GPR into his talk, it makes me angry. But it also makes me feel small and self-conscious, because I am often only one of a few or even the only woman in the room. It reminds everyone that in our society, women are there for the pleasure of men, and makes them more conscious of the fact that I am a woman.
But even if you disagree with my assessment of P..n, there are a myriad of other reasons why incorporating a GPR into your talk is inappropriate. Here are a few:
I am not a fan of P..n, to say the least. I find it highly offensive and degrading to women (and to men, as well). The reasons I believe this are long and complicated, but suffice it to say that this is based upon long hours of thinking, and studying of feminist theory, as well as my own ideas about social justice. So when I encounter some jerk bringing a GPR into his talk, it makes me angry. But it also makes me feel small and self-conscious, because I am often only one of a few or even the only woman in the room. It reminds everyone that in our society, women are there for the pleasure of men, and makes them more conscious of the fact that I am a woman.
But even if you disagree with my assessment of P..n, there are a myriad of other reasons why incorporating a GPR into your talk is inappropriate. Here are a few:
- As the number of people in the audience grows, you are likely speaking to more and more survivors of sexual assault. Survivors of sexual assault are often triggered by GPRs. Why risk triggering someone's post-traumatic stress disorder for a cheap laugh? There are plenty of other ways to get your point across.**
- The best comedians are the ones who talk about humorous situations and use clever wordplay instead of degrading other people. P..n jokes generally boil down to a joke about exploiting other people, which is not a funny topic.***
- P..n is a controversial topic. Since the topic of your presentation is computer science, why mention something that is such a hot button for so many people? There are plenty of controversial views that I hold, such as my disbelief in a deity, but since I want my audience to learn about my topic and enjoy it as much as I do, I don't make jokes about stupid Christians or whatever. (Not only for that reason, but also because I don't think Christians are generally stupid -- they're just mistaken about a particular topic -- and I respect believers as fellow human beings so I find jokes insulting others' intelligence disdainful.)
I've often been accused of being "oversensitive." The problem here is not that I (or my friend) am oversensitive -- it's that others are not sensitive enough. It would be nice if we could just go to work and be scientists instead of having to endure all this crap.
* This word altered to protect my blog from purveyors of said items.
** If you can't think of alternatives, you are seriously lacking in imagination and I feel quite sorry for you.
*** It is the same reason that jokes about minorities, the disabled, and other marginalized people are not funny. But somehow, when it's about p..n, this no longer applies in many people's minds.
Friday, January 14, 2011
My Sad, Sad Sniffer
When I learned about the five senses as a child, I remember comparing the relative enjoyment I derived from each one. I remember thinking that as much as I enjoyed them all, I would miss my sense of smell the least.
That assertion is being tested in my life today. You see, I have mostly lost my sense of smell.
It's not being blocked by nasal congestion. I can breathe just fine. But, when I inhale, my sniffer fails to register some portion of the scents in the air.
It has been a gradual process, but over time, I have been able to smell less and less. I first noticed that I could not smell diaper odors very well when Vinny was still in diapers, but I just attributed it to olfactory adaptation. Instead, I am afraid I am developing anosmia.
The severity of my affliction was underscored the other day when I started to eat some leftovers. They smelled fine to me, but when I took a bite, I could tell that something was not quite right. They tasted a little bitter. So I asked Jeff to check it for me. One whiff and disgusted fanning of his nose later, he informed me that the food smelled so rotten that there was no way it could have even made it into his mouth. Thank goodness he was there to save me from certain food poisoning!
It's interesting, because there are lots of things I can still smell. Skunk, body odor, hydrogen sulfide, and a host of other unpleasant odors are still quite vivid to me. I can also smell some pleasant scents such as citrus, cinnamon, baking bread, and lavender. I can smell some of the components of eucalyptus, and have relearned how to identify it. And, on the bright side, I am almost completely immune to the smell of urine (I can detect that there is a scent but I can't tell what it is).* But whatever was rotten in that food, I completely missed it, and this frightens me greatly. Had I been alone the other day, I might have eaten those leftovers and made myself quite sick.** And I probably would have just thought I had the flu or something, since that food had only been in the fridge for 2 or 3 days.
Other than that, though, the loss of my sense of smell has not been that traumatic. So, maybe I knew what I was talking about.
* The other day I could smell something on Vinny's sleeper, and when I asked him about it he said he had dribbled a little urine on it. So, I can detect urine but it no longer has that unpleasant, acrid smell I recall from the past.
** Maybe I need a personal food taster!
That assertion is being tested in my life today. You see, I have mostly lost my sense of smell.
It's not being blocked by nasal congestion. I can breathe just fine. But, when I inhale, my sniffer fails to register some portion of the scents in the air.
It has been a gradual process, but over time, I have been able to smell less and less. I first noticed that I could not smell diaper odors very well when Vinny was still in diapers, but I just attributed it to olfactory adaptation. Instead, I am afraid I am developing anosmia.
The severity of my affliction was underscored the other day when I started to eat some leftovers. They smelled fine to me, but when I took a bite, I could tell that something was not quite right. They tasted a little bitter. So I asked Jeff to check it for me. One whiff and disgusted fanning of his nose later, he informed me that the food smelled so rotten that there was no way it could have even made it into his mouth. Thank goodness he was there to save me from certain food poisoning!
It's interesting, because there are lots of things I can still smell. Skunk, body odor, hydrogen sulfide, and a host of other unpleasant odors are still quite vivid to me. I can also smell some pleasant scents such as citrus, cinnamon, baking bread, and lavender. I can smell some of the components of eucalyptus, and have relearned how to identify it. And, on the bright side, I am almost completely immune to the smell of urine (I can detect that there is a scent but I can't tell what it is).* But whatever was rotten in that food, I completely missed it, and this frightens me greatly. Had I been alone the other day, I might have eaten those leftovers and made myself quite sick.** And I probably would have just thought I had the flu or something, since that food had only been in the fridge for 2 or 3 days.
Other than that, though, the loss of my sense of smell has not been that traumatic. So, maybe I knew what I was talking about.
* The other day I could smell something on Vinny's sleeper, and when I asked him about it he said he had dribbled a little urine on it. So, I can detect urine but it no longer has that unpleasant, acrid smell I recall from the past.
** Maybe I need a personal food taster!
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Adventures in Calendars
Yesterday I was talking about the fact that sufficient time has elapsed from the arbitrarily set starting point of our calendar system such that the date was filled with ones. I have always been very interested in numbers, and starting when I was about Vinny's age, calendars were a big obsession. I had my own perpetual calendar which I regularly studied. I pored over it, seeking patterns in the days and months -- for example, my sister's birthday in April predicted the day of the week upon which both my September birthday and Christmas would subsequently fall.
That's why, when I saw the following on a Facebook friend's status, I had to respond:
If you think about it, you can see why. The reason July will have five Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays is because the month will start on a Friday this year. The day of the week July starts on is determined by what day January 1 is and whether it is a leap year. There are fourteen unique calendars -- the year can start on one of seven days, and times two because it could be a regular year or a leap year.
There are 365 days in a (non-leap) year. A week consists of seven days, so there are 365/7 = 52 weeks plus one day in a year. This means that the next year begins one day of the week later than the current year. The year that follows a leap year begins two days later. So, this year (2011) began on a Saturday, next year (2012, leap year) begins on a Sunday, and the year after that (2013) begins on a Tuesday.
Non-leap years that begin on Saturday produce Julys with five three-day weekends. So do leap years that begin on Friday (because that extra day occurs before July). Thus there are two out of the fourteen possible calendars that exhibit this phenomenon.
But at what frequency do these calendars occur? After all, there could be some calendars that occur more frequently than others. Obviously, leap calendars are less frequent than regular calendars, but all leap and regular calendars occur with the same frequency as their counterparts. In fact, there is a 28-year calendar cycle that is easily generated.
Let's code the days of the week as follows: Sunday = 0, Monday = 1, Tuesday = 2, Wednesday = 3, Thursday = 4, Friday = 5, Saturday = 6. We can denote the year starting with a given day of the week with the corresponding number.
If there were no leap years, the sequence would look like this:
0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...
However, there are leap years, so the sequence gets interrupted once every four years. Let's denote leap years with a prime (') and the color red:
0, 1, 2, 3', 5, 6, 0, 1', 3, 4, 5, 6', 1, 2, 3, 4', 6, 0, 1, 2', 4, 5, 6, 0', 2, 3, 4, 5'
(at this point we start over with 0, 1, 2...)
If you count it up, there are three of each of the years 0 to 6 in this 28-year span, and one of each leap year. So, if we count up the number of sixes and five-primes in the sequence (years with five three-day weekends in July), we get four out of 28, or one in seven.
So, I'm sorry, Facebook friend, but this phenomenon occurs on average once out of every 7 years, more than 100 times more frequently than you have asserted. Your post will be as effective as all the other forms of feng shui -- in other words, completely ineffective. But, at least it gave me something interesting to write about!
That's why, when I saw the following on a Facebook friend's status, I had to respond:
I'm not superstitious, but this year July has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays. This happens once every 823 years. This is called money bags. So, copy this to your status and money will arrive within 4 days. Based on Chinese Feng Shui. The one who does not copy.....will be without money.This July will indeed have five Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays, but this is a frequent occurrence -- once every seven years, on average.
If you think about it, you can see why. The reason July will have five Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays is because the month will start on a Friday this year. The day of the week July starts on is determined by what day January 1 is and whether it is a leap year. There are fourteen unique calendars -- the year can start on one of seven days, and times two because it could be a regular year or a leap year.
There are 365 days in a (non-leap) year. A week consists of seven days, so there are 365/7 = 52 weeks plus one day in a year. This means that the next year begins one day of the week later than the current year. The year that follows a leap year begins two days later. So, this year (2011) began on a Saturday, next year (2012, leap year) begins on a Sunday, and the year after that (2013) begins on a Tuesday.
Non-leap years that begin on Saturday produce Julys with five three-day weekends. So do leap years that begin on Friday (because that extra day occurs before July). Thus there are two out of the fourteen possible calendars that exhibit this phenomenon.
But at what frequency do these calendars occur? After all, there could be some calendars that occur more frequently than others. Obviously, leap calendars are less frequent than regular calendars, but all leap and regular calendars occur with the same frequency as their counterparts. In fact, there is a 28-year calendar cycle that is easily generated.
Let's code the days of the week as follows: Sunday = 0, Monday = 1, Tuesday = 2, Wednesday = 3, Thursday = 4, Friday = 5, Saturday = 6. We can denote the year starting with a given day of the week with the corresponding number.
If there were no leap years, the sequence would look like this:
0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...
However, there are leap years, so the sequence gets interrupted once every four years. Let's denote leap years with a prime (') and the color red:
0, 1, 2, 3', 5, 6, 0, 1', 3, 4, 5, 6', 1, 2, 3, 4', 6, 0, 1, 2', 4, 5, 6, 0', 2, 3, 4, 5'
(at this point we start over with 0, 1, 2...)
If you count it up, there are three of each of the years 0 to 6 in this 28-year span, and one of each leap year. So, if we count up the number of sixes and five-primes in the sequence (years with five three-day weekends in July), we get four out of 28, or one in seven.
So, I'm sorry, Facebook friend, but this phenomenon occurs on average once out of every 7 years, more than 100 times more frequently than you have asserted. Your post will be as effective as all the other forms of feng shui -- in other words, completely ineffective. But, at least it gave me something interesting to write about!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Happy 1/11/11!
It is a pretty exciting day on the calendar today for those of us who love numbers -- all 1's (and notice my time stamp -- 11:11 pm). I enjoy patterns like this even though the only meaning is that sufficient time has elapsed since the arbitrary starting date of our calendar system such that there are a lot of ones in the date.
In other news, we have had a lot of snow lately (where by "a lot of snow" I mean about three inches). This has caused sufficient havoc that they even closed my workplace on Monday, and Vinny's school has been out for three days this week (another snow day tomorrow). It was Vinny's snack day tomorrow, and I baked up some blueberry-banana muffins for school, which I now have to do something with since school was cancelled.
In other news, we have had a lot of snow lately (where by "a lot of snow" I mean about three inches). This has caused sufficient havoc that they even closed my workplace on Monday, and Vinny's school has been out for three days this week (another snow day tomorrow). It was Vinny's snack day tomorrow, and I baked up some blueberry-banana muffins for school, which I now have to do something with since school was cancelled.
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